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Does Your Husband Still Think You Are Sexy?
00:04 by Cindy English · 10 Comments
Or does he even look anymore?
We women are far more self-conscious about our bodies than men are. We are painfully aware that our “value” is often superficially measured by our appearance.
When we are in our twenties, smooth skin, perky boobs and firm butts come naturally and we use those assets to our advantage to attract a suitable partner.
But, as the years roll by and “life” happens, things change. Our bodies change.
It’s easy to let yourself go when you are caught up with raising a family. Kids, work, stress – they all take their toll on a woman’s ability to “rejuvenate”. Finding the “personal time” to exercise, have a facial or just pamper yourself becomes difficult so, you put it off “until tomorrow”.
Before you know it, you don’t like what you see in the mirror and – neither does your husband!
Remember…”My wife just isn’t physically appealing anymore” is number 3 on the list of the Top 10 Reasons Why Men Cheat!
When we let ourselves go, it’s not just our appearance that suffers, our relationship with our partner does too. We become insecure and more self-conscious, hiding our bodies.. We don’t feel sexy anymore and our sex life suffers for it. Big mistake!
It is very important, not only for your relationship but for your own self esteem to keep yourself in shape. When you feel good about yourself, it shows. Being “sexy” is a state of mind. When you “feel it” so will your partner and chances are, he will stick around to grow old gracefully with you!
You cannot stop aging, but you sure can slow it down. There are many beautiful “older” women in the world today to prove that we are advancing in “anti-aging” techniques. Diane Keaton, Susan Sarandon, Meryl Streep, Lauren Hutton – hell, Lauren Hutton even posed nude for a major magazine at 62! Wow!
These women should be an inspiration to all of us. Looking great through the years can be done! And the best thing about these ladies? They have aged naturally without the use of Botox, liposuction or plastic surgery! Bravo!
So, come on girls, put the kids to bed and set aside some time “just for you”. It’s never too late unless you never start! Make your husband sit up and take notice, because if he doesn’t…
Someone else will!
Need a little help?
Simply AntiAging
is a fabulous site full of useful information to get you back on track and looking your best!
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My hubby still finds me sexy but it hasn’t stopped me looking elsewhere
Hi Me,
I read your entries in your new blog. Be very careful, you are heading down a dangerous path! Please “look before you leap!” You are not “in love” no matter how exciting and wonderful it feels right now. If what you have with your husband is of value to you, know that you WILL regret your decision and miss your husband once he’s gone. Good luck!
Just stop looking!!! focus on the qualities that caught your attention from your hubby, appreciate what you have and embrace it!!!. You need to be careful, think of how bad you could hurt him and I am pretty sure a mistake would hurt you as well.
If a man wanted you as his wife, he must love you and care for you, and you’re lucky for that. Don’t need anyone else, enjoy your husband, love him, cherish him and RESPECT HIM!!! how would you feel if he would keep looking else where? if you wouldn’t feel good then STOP DOING IT!!!
Ladies, it pains me to say that I suffered from the “I’m just not into you anymore” thoughts for a long time.
I stayed in my marriage for the kids, had the 2 year affair with a hot, bi-curious 110 lb. sexy redhead and after the affair was discovered (They always are!) we went through our pain and decided to USE the affair to get at the root cause of our disintegrating love life.
My wife became HOT! She lost the weight, dressed up, and I became a committed husband again. I listened more, did odd jobs without being asked and I learned that if I have any problems again, to BRING THEM UP instead of going somewhere else!
Our connection has increased and I can now have all the affairs I want (with my wife!) who has become an expert at role playing, sex games, and other mischief to keep us BOTH interested.
Hi ,i was wondering if you could give me some advice? my husband and i have been married almost 1 yr.we have went thur alot with my bipolar disored .when we meet he took a child that wasn’t his and claimed her as his on.I was pregant needless to say,wellmsince i have her i haven’t lost any of my weight (maybe a pound or two,that’s it. well i know nothing about dieting or how to excersise or what to do to lose the weight,god knows i give anything to be small again. but the other dat i went to touch him sexually,but it had no affect on him, infact shortly after that he told me i wasn’t sexy to him anymore and god that really hurt badly. well he says it’s because of my mind set,but the last few weeks i have tried really hard to get dressed up and put makeup on,so i really don’t understand.yes i guess i do have a low selfesteem b/c/ i have never been this big in my life( which is the most190) I just really need some advice, he swears he loves me and would never cheat,but i don’t know b/c of the things he says like that. all help ia greatly appericaited. thanks and god bless
Joy…
I have read this more than once, and the biggest issue that I see is your admitted lack of self-esteem. The difficulty with that, is that sometimes only you can improve your self esteem. Losing weight can help; women in particular seem to fight the weight battle once we have children. I’ve done it myself, as has nearly everyone else that I know that has children. Very few women don’t gain a pound or two along the way. I could write you a book on losing weight, but am not sure this is the place for it, but what I can say is for you to make YOURself and taking care of YOURself a priority! The fact that you’re making an effort to put on make-up, dress up, and look better is a good thing. =) When you do those little things, they make a difference in how you perceive yourself, as well as how you are perceived.
Community centers frequently have exercise classes and new parenting groups and things like that and can offer assistance and support for little or nothing financially, and most even offer daycare.
Your hubby for all intents and purposes (from what you say) seems to be a nice guy, and I’m sure it’s not his intention to hurt you, but simply to be honest with you. My biggest concern from him is his lack of response to your advances…while it’s normal for our attraction at some point in any relationship to wane, after only a year and one baby, and with his statement that he does love you, it strikes me as unusual. You are right to pay attention to this immediately, and you should continue to monitor his reactions to you.
Above all you should continue to work on yourself, and do little things that make you feel good about yourself; as a wife, a mother, and a woman you have tremendous value, and you need to appreciate all the good things about yourself. I would suggest that you dress in things that feel good and look good, and will boost your self-confidence; it’s easy to throw on sweats and a tee shirt while caring for a baby, but at the same time, they don’t do much for you, and make it easier to eat more! You need to rebuild your self-esteem, and feed yourself the positive reinforcement that you may not be getting elsewhere. It’s not an easy task, but it is possible…and feeding that self-esteem will no doubt mean that you eat less food and lose a few more pounds. It’s a great cycle to be on! =)
In weak moments, I always say to myself that “nothing tastes as good as being sexy feels….”
You should also keep in mind that losing the weight may or may not impact your relationship with your husband, and you therefore need to be doing this for yourself…there may be deeper issues there (hard to say without the whole story) that weight loss won’t solve. But the bottom line is that no matter what the outcome, you will benefit the most for yourself and your child if you rebuild your self-esteem, and learn not to base your value on your weight.
In summation, the article says it all better than I can in one phrase; “sexy is a state of mind”….none of us are perfect, but it’s the head held high, the shoulders back (represent girls)!, the sway of confidence in your hips, and the smile on your lips that will get and keep a man’s attention each time…
Me and my man have been together for almost 3 yrs, we use to have sex all day every day in the beginning naturally. But we don’t anymore we have sex like once a week now. He has a job where he goes to people houses and he talks to them Im not sure if he’s starting to look elsewhere. He swears he would never cheat, but I can’t help but to feel otherwise. As for me i’ve been feeling really neglected lately, I don’t wear makeup ever only when Im going out which is Never Im always stuck in our house all day every day, oh and Im always wearing t – shirts and big shorts . We dont go out b/c of his job he works 6 days a week,and the day he gets off is like a monday. Sometimes I feel like aleast he goes places even if it is work he talks to people and Im sure some are women. I just feel really UGLY and depressed and he’s doesnt seem to care to try to help. What else can I do.
Lucia, just because you’re at home all day every day , does not mean you should look frumpy..eeww… You have all day every day to look pretty for your man do it !! More importantly do it for YOURSELF!
I don’t find my wife sexy anymore. Been married 40 plus years and the last 30 have been sex less and without intimacy.I just don’t feel my wife desirves any sex, so I stopped having sex with her. I have to say that was the best thing I’ve ever done. She is boring and really prudish when it came to sex.
You know, I read your comments about losing wt, making yourself “hot” again. REALLY! Why in the world would I change myself? If there is a problem with the way my husband treats me it is his fault! No one should ever be told to lose wt, or change the way they look because he doesn’t feel the same. Love is unconditional! I might have gained wt, but it is not my fault if my husband finds me unattractive and feels the need to find gratification somewhere else. I want to know when is it that woman are going to stand up for themselves and not let these men tell us how we should look or what we should feel! We are supposed to just support these men in thier times of need but when it comes to us women…well…..we are just nagging or complaining….well I am tired of my husband taking advantage of all that I do for my family…he didn’t give birth to our children…..he didn’t slave after himself and the children day after day year after year! And guess what…..when a man is disrespectful to his wife..then so are his children. I beleive that if he doesn’t respect, love, and charish his wife and realize how much she does for him and his family…then maybe he shouldn’t have the privilage of haveing her!