The Scarlet Letter

January 16, 2010 by admin · 4 Comments 

I have a girlfriend that was married 5 times by the time she was 35.

The reason for all of this? She wanted to have fun, have variety, and have sex, but because of the way she was raised, she felt that our culture and society determined that she should marry to do and experience those things!

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Ashley Madison Agency Makes Tiger Woods An Offer

January 7, 2010 by cenglish · 1 Comment 

You know, I'll be the first to admit that Tiger may have gone "just a little" overboard with his extramarital affairs but, a spokesman for Ashley Madison Agency?

Be serious! The guy is horny – he's not suicidal for crissake!

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Pay For Play – Going Down With The Economy

August 10, 2009 by bcalendar · 8 Comments 

Infidelity doesn't always have to be about romance. Sometimes it can simply be about going out and getting good sex. Sometimes it's about making yourself feel beautiful, feminine and desired. And sometimes, it can just be about the money.

As noted on Salon and Jezebel, many middle class women – even ones who are married or in long-term relationships – are becoming escorts. Part of this has to do with the fact that the Internet has made escorting much safer and easier to do. And a big part of it is that the economy is tanking. Lots of women are getting laid off from their jobs, having their hours cut or being forced to take very low paying jobs because finding employment that matches their education and expertise can be nearly impossible.

As one young woman on Jezebel put it: “Something dawned on me: I'd rather be exploited for $200/hr than for $7/hr.”
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Is Monogamy A Myth?

January 11, 2009 by Cindy English · Leave a Comment 

So…is monogamy really a myth?

We flirt.
We date.
We fall in love.
We marry.
We live happily-ever-after…or do we?

Not likely and the number one killer of our "fairy tale life"? Adultery.

With approximately 22 percent of all divorces being the result of adultery, Cinderella and Prince Charming need more than a Fairy Godmother to help them stay together!

It is difficult to get accurate statistics on infidelity because people are not always willing to disclose their indescretions. However, according to Peggy Vaughan, the author of "The Monogamy Myth", recent statistics suggest that 40% of women (and that number is increasing) and 60% of men at some point indulge in extramarital affairs. Since these people are not always married to each other, that indicates that approximately 80% of all marriages are touched by infidelity.

One thing is crystal clear. We cheat!
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Holiday Blues

November 30, 2008 by Cindy English · 1 Comment 

The holidays can really suck slough water can't they?

This is for all of the lonely people out there currently suffering from the "Holiday Blues".

When I started "Our Cheating Ways" originally, I saw it as an opportunity to talk about a subject that affects millions of people – infidelity.

While I have done my best to tackle the topic objectively, there is so much more that I would like to say, perhaps, more on a personal level.

I do believe that cheating is a personal choice and that on occasion the reasons that led to it may be valid. However, I also believe that the cure for "what ails you" is very temporary while the pain caused can be quite permanent.

The affair always ends but the damage lasts a lifetime!
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Children Are The Real Victims Of Infidelity

October 6, 2007 by Cindy English · 5 Comments 

Multiple marriages seem to be very common today.

I know a woman, Julie, who recently went through her fifth divorce.

She is 31 years old!

Her longest marriage lasted two and a half years and her shortest was seven months. This would indicate to me that there are underlying "issues" that make it impossible for her to maintain a relationship but that is not what puzzles me most.

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Does Double Dipping Effect Your Kids?

June 19, 2007 by Cindy English · 1 Comment 

Elizabeth from The View blasts infidelity and the effect it is having on our kids.

I tend to agree with her.





Infidelity is effecting our children and our society. You have to be blind not to see it.
Look around!

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A Cheating Story – Could This Be You?

June 3, 2007 by Cindy English · 6 Comments 

I was one of the walking wounded…the cheated.

My story is not "unique" by any stretch of the imagination.

In fact, it is almost a cliché!

Sadly, hundreds of good women will see themselves in my story. But, just because it is so familiar, doesn't make it any less painful for each woman who endures it.

Let me tell you what I have learned.

At 20, I married my long time friend and lover. He was a handsome 'bad boy' who was fun and had a terrific sense of humor. He was very spontaneous and he was great in bed! What else could any young girl possibly wish for?

We were young, "in love", and having the time of our lives. We hung out with our friends, we partied hard, went games, concerts and everything else that was 'important' in life.
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Good Alibis Are Easy To Find

April 13, 2007 by Cindy English · Leave a Comment 

Good alibis are easy to find…at least if they weren't before, they definitely are now!

The Alibi Network continues to draw major media attention, now from none other than ABC News Nightline.

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Your Cheating Wife Does NOT Mean Inevitable Divorce!

March 8, 2007 by admin · 6 Comments 

Finally, someone who gets it!

I found this terrific article written by Larry Bilotta entitled: Does a Cheating Wife Inevitably Lead to Divorce?.

This article thrilled me to no end because finally, I found someone who thinks as I do about the whole infidelity issue.

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Infidelity Always Comes Back To Haunt You!

March 3, 2007 by Cindy English · 3 Comments 

Once a cheater always a cheater. If you are caught with "your pants down" so to speak, it will never be forgotten.

Let's play a little word association shall we?

"Blue dress" – Monica Lewinsky
"Cigar" – Bill Clinton
"Monica Lewinsky" – Bill Clinton
"Cheater" – Bill Clinton

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"5 Things You Shouldn't Do If He's Cheating on You"

February 13, 2007 by admin · Leave a Comment 

© Ruth Houston

This may be the most important report you’ll read about dealing with your husband’s affair.

There’s plenty of information available on what to do if your husband is cheating. But very little has been written about the things you shouldn’t do.

You just found out your husband is cheating on you. You’re still reeling from the shock and you're not quite sure what to do.

Before wrestling with that decision, let’s focus first on what you SHOULDN'T do.

Most women react blindly when they find out their husbands are having an affair. They let fear, anger, hurt, or a desire for revenge compel them to do things they later regret — things which make it difficult or impossible to implement any worthwhile infidelity advice they may later receive.

This report will keep you from making a mistake that could sabotage the course of action you eventually decide to take. Regardless of whether you decide to leave your husband or stay with him and try to work things out, doing the wrong thing at the outset can make a bad situation worse.

Let’s look at 5 key things you shouldn't do and discuss the reasons why…
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Cheating Husbands – What Are The Signs?

February 3, 2007 by Cindy English · 15 Comments 

You are a woman. You are intuitive. You "sense" that something about your relationship with your husband or partner has changed. You may be right!

Many of the physical signs of a cheating spouse apply to both sexes. The renewed focus on fitness and appearance, the new clothes and the change in interests. Those things are pretty universal to both men and women.

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I'm Not Married, So It's Not Really Cheating…Is It?

January 15, 2007 by admin · 1 Comment 

Today, infidelity has become almost normal – expected even. Hell, it's practical, it's trendy, it's so very "modern"!

What Is The Definition Of Love?

January 13, 2007 by Cindy English · 3 Comments 

It is really amazing to me that we, as intelligent human beings, often rate the success or failure of our relationship with a spouse or partner on only one thing…sex!

So, Who's Cheating Now?

January 10, 2007 by cenglish · 6 Comments 

With a reported 50% increase in infidelity among woman, a cheating wife is not such a rarity anymore.

So what's the scoop?

Are more women really partaking of the same adulterous rendezvous' that they have long condemned males for? Yes, they are. They may do it for different reasons then men do, but they are doing it.

Many men cheat on their wives purely for the joy of sex. They aren't getting enough at home, so, they go for the "married but not getting any – sex, that's what we're here for – no strings attached" routine. Pure, sexual gratification is really all they are looking for. They have absolutely no desire to change their current situation or disrupt their family. Considering sex to be a natural male, physical "need" and disassociating it from "love" can justify cheating for a man.

For women on the other hand, things are not quite that simple. They are more likely to misinterpret the intimacy of sex with another as emotional closeness, something they may feel they are lacking with their husband.
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Cheating Is Nothing New!

January 7, 2007 by cenglish · Leave a Comment 

I am not even going to insult anyone's intelligence by listing the so-called cheating statistics here. How accurate are they anyway? Not everyone is going to kiss and tell.

It doesn't take a genius to realize that the world is changing and that infidelity is fast becoming a national past time. We are a culture obsessed with self gratification. The two things we want most in life? Sex and money. Don't believe me? Just do a quick search on SEO Book for the average monthly searches performed. At the time of this writing: sex – 25,960,830 money – 2,254,067. It's not hard to tell where our heads are at!

And please do not tell me that it is mostly men who do the cheating. If that is the case, why are there almost equal numbers of men searching for "signs of a cheating wife/girlfriend" as there is women searching for "signs of a cheating man/boyfriend"?

It's a tired old song – it's the men who cheat and they are 'scum of the earth'. Come on ladies, you do your share of it too! Are you 'scum' when you cheat? No, you were 'driven' to it by a cold, insensitive, uncaring man! Rubbish! If it is an unpardonable offense for a man, then it should be for a woman too.

Cheating is not a new trend. Grandfathers and great-grandfathers cheated and yes, even great-grandmothers. The thing is, back then, we were a lot less likely to air our dirty linen in public than we are now. We may have strayed every now and then but we had the conviction to stay with and support the families we created. With twelve kids and a farm to run, who had time to worry that little bro had blue eyes and blonde hair when the rest of the family were brunettes? Damn the milkman anyway!

King Henry VIII of England was cheating on his first wife Catherine with her lady in waiting, Anne, back in 1526. When he tired of her company in favor of Jane, poor Anne was beheaded under false charges of witchcraft. At least Prince Charles and Princess Diana were allowed to divorce, but, not before making public spectacles of themselves! No swift beheading there. They dragged their follies out in public for years before mercifully putting an end to it.

So, Kings and Queens do it, politicians do it (Clinton will be forever remembered saying "I did not have sex with that woman"), celebrities do it DAILY, hell even our televangelists do it. Remember Jimmy Swaggart bawling his eyes out on national TV? And what about Ted Haggard's sordid 'affair'?. He was the former president of the National Evangelical Association, which represents 30 million evangelical Christians. Good grief, is no one immune to the sinful clutches of infidelity? I guess not.

It may have been a 60's doctrine but the catch phrase "If it feels good – do it!" is alive and well. We believe it, we live it, and everyday, just like kids, we push the envelope just a little further.

So, where are we headed? Infidelity will continue to rise and marriage will become a thing of the past I expect. Already the terms 'husband' and 'wife' are being replaced with the endearing title of 'significant other'. How romantic!

Along with the Internet comes the likely hood that people who are 'at risk' will cheat. In ten minutes, you can log on to any dating site and fill out your profile. By the end of the day, you will be solicited for sex. It's that easy!

With no one there to stop you…will you cheat?

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