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Top 10 Reasons Why Men Cheat
00:31 by Cindy English · 113 Comments
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The question is as old as the problem itself…
Why do men cheat?
Is monogamy really a myth?
Are guys predestined to cheat because it is human nature?
Scientists have long explained that men are biologically motivated to seek out multiple sex partners. This natural instinct ensures a healthy gene pool and the survival of our species.
If this is true, then one cannot expect fidelity from a man. It kind of lets guys off the hook when they wander doesn’t it?
So why do they feel guilty? If it is a man’s biological right to have sex wherever, whenever, with whomever, why should they worry about being caught?
Because somewhere along the way, self imposed “ethics” and “morality” placed restrictions on human behavior…including sex!
Perhaps if guys didn’t seem to derive such pleasure from sex, it wouldn’t be such a sin. Think about it. If sex with multiple partners were just another “chore” for men as cleaning house and cooking meals is to women, would we get upset about it?
Probably not…poor guys! 
Nevertheless…men do enjoy sex…a lot…and not always with their partner!
Here are their Top 10 reasons…
I’d like to say that they are in no particular order but, we all know what guys say is the number one reason that they cheat. Remember ladies, the jokes about sex ending when marriage begins, wouldn’t be funny if there weren’t some truth to them!
- Not getting enough at home! Women tend to get caught up in “life” and sex gets put on the “back burner”. She may be bent over helping the kids tie their shoes but he’s still looking at her “nice ass”. God…is that all they think about?
- It’s reassuring to know that he’s still “got it”. Time has a way of making us all feel less sexy and desirable. A little forbidden rendezvous can be a real shot to a sagging male ego.
- The wife just isn’t physically appealing anymore. Face it, women do tend to let themselves go. Often they get too busy raising their families and neglect themselves. They are too tired to put on make up or do those thigh slimming exercises. The result? A sexy new secretary and whatdayaknow…”Honey…I have to work late”!
- Sex at home is boring. The wife doesn’t like to try new things (or old things – namely, blow jobs!). To men, variety is the spice of life and he may have some sexual urges that his wife is not willing to fulfill. He may have some ideas that he would rather his wife didn’t know about. Can you say “manage-a-trios”?
- He just couldn’t say no. The woman was hot and all over him. It just seemed like a once in a lifetime opportunity…too good to pass up. This is where the phrase “thinking with their little head” came from!
- The wife just isn’t fun anymore. She worries, she nags, she fusses and they fight all of the time. He cheats to “get away from it all”.
- He just doesn’t love his wife anymore. And just how do you tell someone that tactfully? It is easier to have an affair than it is to deal with the pain and emotional upheaval of such a confession. On the other hand…if he is caught cheating? Well, the door is then opened for a speedy exit!
- The thrill of the chase is exhilarating. Some men are truly addicted not only to the act of sex itself, but to the hunt. They thrive on the rush they get when they are able to conquer even the toughest “ice queen”. It’s not about love, it’s about control and winning!
- They cheat because they can. Many men know that their wives are insecure and dependant on them. They also know that low self esteem and a fear of being alone will keep her “in place” and “at home” no matter what, or who they do. So, why not? Variety – remember?
- And finally, men cheat to get even! It is an absolute blow to the male ego for his sexual prowess to be in question. Why else would a woman cheat on him? His own affair as a result, serves two purposes, revenge and reassurance of manhood.
There you have it…the Top 10 reasons why men say that they cheat on their wives or partners.
Are any of them “excuseable”?
Mmmm…a couple…maybe (although most women won’t agree).
Are any of them “preventable”?
Of course.
Although monogamy may not human nature…it is a choice!
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Beautiful Enslavement
Gary,
I do not know what you are seeking help for but quite obviously you have not found the right help! With respect to your comment, what could possibly hurt your wife and children more than killing yourself? People who choose this method to solve their problems have NO IDEA of the damage and destruction they leave behind!!! Your problems will be solved – as for your family that you love so much – theirs will just begin!
The Top 10 Reasons Why Men Cheat, written by some woman. What a joke. If women want to know why men cheat, then just ask them. It’s not difficult. Just ask.
Honestly, the reasons can vary. We can cheat because we want sex with other partners. To women, this is a sign that we don’t love you, but to us men it’s ONLY a sign that we want sex with other partners.
Men don’t think of sex as a sign of love. We really don’t. We may say it is, and we may even convince you, but we only say all this stupid romantic shit so we can get you in bed. Hate it or not, its the truth.
Men separate sex from emotion in their brains very differently than women are able to (which is why a man can have sex with a woman and ignore and/or degrade and insult her later). We just don’t connect the two. Love is how we feel for you. Sex is what we want from you.
To us, love is not something as shallow as just a decision to have sex with someone- our conception is so much more fulfilling and profound. When we love you, our love is what makes us always want to come back to you. We may want to have sex with another woman, but she won’t be the one who we want to be the mother of our children. When we desire another woman, think of it as just us drinking sodas- it’s what we want on occasion, but we don’t view it as a serious replacement for the water that you are to us.
The way you can show that you love us is by NOT being mad over this. Afterall, it’s in our genes! Just as you cannot control having a weaker ability to not cry when upset, we can’t control our inner nature to seek out multiple partners. It has NOTHING to do with you. We STILL love you, and the women we may cheat on you with probably know that, too.
Just let it be, accept it, and embrace it. We will LOVE YOU MORE if you respond by embracing and appreciating it, rather than crying (we hate it when you cry- it bugs the shit out of us and makes us feel like we’re dating/married to a 4 year old) and arguing.
For women seeking a tip on how to embrace their man’s inner nature: SUGGEST YOU AND HE HAVE A THREESOME. The beauty in this is threefold: 1) You will see firsthand just how men separate sex from love. 2) The worrying about him going behind your back is diminished- if he can get sex with another woman AND YOU, as opposed to just some late night office fling without, he’ll choose the option that includes you (this decision is cemented down the more and more you and your man “exercise” with another). 3) He will love and appreciate you more. A relationship requires compromise- lots of it. Do this for him and you’ll be surprised how eager he will be to compromise when it comes up later (though a note is in order here: NEVER USE THE SEX AS AN ARGUING POINT! Do not argue that because you did this for him, now he OWES you anything. This not only will make him mad, but it makes you look like a whore, using sex to gain the things you want.)
If you have any questions or want some points of clarification, feel free to email me: adamryan zao @ a o l . com (remove the spaces).
Cheers,
-adamryan
So.. since guys separate emotion from sex then girls can to. And if woman. Should be supportive after a man has had sex with another women then why do men get mad if a woman has sex with another man. Love is supposibly just an emotion once a woman has sex with another man then men consider it cheating very hypocritical, don’t you think?
Adam you are an idiot, sure ,I’ll suggest a threesome with my man- only it will be another man not another bitch! then see how good of an idea he thinks it is.
@adam you are straight dumb as fuck. we do connect sex with emotion. if you fuck a bitch that you just met it feels good as fuck but if you make love to a girl that you really have feelings for and really have an emotional connection with it is so much better. dudes like you is the reason ALL men get classified as pigs. so instead of saying thats how men are try saying thats how you are.
@adam you are straight dumb as fuck. we do connect sex with emotion. if you fuck a bitch that you just met it feels good as fuck but if you make love to a girl that you really have feelings for and really have an emotional connection with it is so much better. dudes like you is the reason ALL men get classified as pigs. so instead of saying thats how men are try saying thats how you are.
@adam Thank you. I am a woman and I am listening to what you have to say. The other women cannot handle the truth. What you say here makes sense and I appreciate that you have shared this. It would be super difficult for me to see my partner physically having sex with another woman. Maybe I just need to reach a place where I am able to handle this mentally but right now I don’t see it as possible.
I am writing to you on behalf of the Oprah Winfrey Network. We are working on a show that deals with men who have betrayed their wives. We are looking for about 3 men in the Los Angeles area to talk with us about this topic, and I was wondering if you might know of any. My number is 818 788 3655. Thank you and I look forward to hearing back from someone.
Thanks so much,
Jane Kaplan
Clearly my post didn’t go over well with a few people. I’ll respond to some of the criticisms raised and then maybe add a little more to my original post.
1) Jenny,
Though your response attempts to be witty and contradictory, all of your struggle at doing so is done in vain, as I could only luckily understand what it is you were trying to say. Laden with misspelled words, poor grammar, elementary-like punctuation and horrible syntactical mistakes, your response reads as though the English language had sex with what your rebuttal was supposed to be and you drunkenly aborted it onto your keyboard for the world to see. As such, your points need to no further refutation other than this: If you cannot write as an adult (as is clearly the case), then please do not behave as one (having sex or going on the internet without adult supervision).
2) Kdkblessed,
To begin with, I want to start by saying that your critique has already lost its force. You lose credibility in the first sentence because you both: A) project an adhominem my way (which is often an indication of defeat) and B) seem to implicitly call yourself a bitch. I have to admit, this is a unique strategy, and is thus why I nevertheless gave you the benefit of the doubt and decided to suspend judgment until I had finished your punctuation-interrupted run on sentence. Naturally, you can imagine my disappointment when I finished reading your wisdom.
That being said, your point is met- if a man desires two women at once, then what is wrong with women desiring two men at once?
This is actually quite easy to answer: A man being with two women is not okay, and neither is a woman being with two men. I suggested a three-some to the women who feel their man may cheat so that THE WOMEN could have a chance of not having their man stray behind their backs. What the three-some does for the man is open him up to being more honest with his wife, enabling him to feel like he can express his inner desires to be with another woman, to her, and having her (his wife/girlfriend) know that though she may feel like there is no way out, there actually is- that is, if she’s open to it.
I never said that this would be emotionally simple for either spouse, nor did I say it was the “right” thing to do- I am only suggesting that it COULD BE a way of coping with the man’s desires, which would result in him being more likely to keep his honesty with you; it was a positive suggestion in that it included the woman who, otherwise, may have had her heart broken by deceit.
3) Xavier,
Though your writing ability is obviously poor, your point is clear: I ought to admit that this is only how I am, and that I shouldn’t make such declarative statements for the whole male gender, as opposing views may arise. Point well taken. However, my initial post is the culmination of views by not only my personal experience dating, but also of close friends and others I have known. The response is a pragmatic one, meant to be prescriptive at one’s own discretion, not descriptive of how things ought to be.
Also (and this is just a suggestion here), try to avoid saying things like, “if you fuck a bitch that you just met…”. You undermine your chivalry when you present it this way.
4) Anonymous Kthxbai,
Again, I am not saying that this should be obvious to anyone, or that all men will seize the opportunity if it is presented to them (to have a threesome). The truth is, sometimes these things happen and it’s hard to tell if there could have been anything done in advance to prevent it. I’m only trying to help here, if these suggestions can benefit you in the current relationship troubles you’re facing, then I’m glad. I’m just a man on the internet willing to speak his mind, not afraid to battle against ignorant criticisms, and brave enough to cut through political correctness and pop-psychology to get to the root of what I see as a possibly avoidable problem.
In this regard, I hope I have been at least more helpful than not.
5) Jane Kaplan,
A date is not given for your post. Are you still looking for men?
Cheers,
-adamryan
I really understand the fact that men want multiple partners and if ever I’m going to have a husband (soon ahaha) I’ll let him have fun but he got to have no one (besides me) pregnant. Guys need space, new stuffs and new sex habits that just having one woman can’t provide.
Everyone needs his or her partner’s fidelity but no one can have it really. Just accept the fact that we got tried of everything. The law of diminishing marginal returns can prove that. Just accept it. Besides, he’ll come back if he really loves you. And women also needs to improve one’s self instead of burying herself into stress(making her fat), nagging and nagging about everything, and thinking as if the man won’t live without her aid! Gosh! Some women are know-it-all and some are clingy cats! Anyway ^_^… Just be a gal who knows how to go on with the flow of things, have a voice and know your limitations.
@Adam I really like your posts! ^_^ Can I add you to my email?? ^_^
I had an affair w/a married that I have know for many years. We recently reconnected during the summer of 2010. He has not been faithful for many years. He says he loves his wife much. She is his best friend and the mother is his children, but has never been faithful to her, His reason: she gives him vanilla sex once a month( they are in their mid-50″s). He wants his sex kinky and wild. Doggie style, anal ,vibrators and 3 somes.
A lot of what is being discussed has to do with maturity. Just as a person is able to decide & determine how much to eat , drink, how fast to drive, etc. etc. – so can man decide how to respond to his sexual urges. We ALL have urges – how we respond to them depends upon our level of maturity. The old adage of “boys will be boys” doesn’t fly – it serves only as a lame excuse to over-indulge ones controllable urges. The refusal to make the effort to ‘control’ ones appetites leads down the road to destruction – in many ways. Anyone who values relationships knows that all aspects of one can be so severely damaged by the male “sowing his wild oats” that it’s just a matter of time before it crumbles into a pile of hurtful rubble.
In a civilized society there has to be some kind of laws/rules of conduct or chaos takes over. We are mandated to stop at red lights, respect the privacy of another’s home & knock on the door as opposed to merely entering at will, and numerous other accepted forms of behaviors that allow us to live in a semblance of peace and tranquility. Monogamy also brings about these conditions, for the most part, and those people who choose it – contribute to that part of society that is mature, moral, and willing to put their appetites under control. How is that done? One avoids putting themselves in situations that would encourage and feed into the inevitable. The mature individual recognizes the potential possibilities and steers away from them instead of allowing for the continuation of self-gratifying behaviors.
It is an entirely selfish individual who refuses to distance themselves from destructive behaviors and can think only on a level of “SELF”. They deny the very real infliction of hurt and grief and pain that results and inevitably torments the “loved ones” who are told to abide by it all because it is “the nature of man”. Stop peddling the garbage that is offensively attempting to influence women to “get over it” and accept something that is totally unacceptable. In other words – GROW UP!!
Hi,
By looking around my world , I see very little difference between human males and the other animal males. Human beings are basically animals with very strong sexual instict. Sex therefore is an instict with its primarily purpose for mating. Mating is important to keep any race going. Men therefore subconciously seek for extramarital sex to keep the human race going. Marrital fidelity is a moral imposition to keep human beings in society responsibly. Therefore men will always seek extramarital sex with other females not because they don’t love their wives but because naturally they have to keep the race going.
You people who keep bringing up this animal instinct idea are not making any sense. You cannot relate human beings and other animals when it comes to sex!
If it is animal instinct to mate with many partners, then why use condoms when you are sleeping with multiple partners? Animals have many mates in order to spread their genes, NOT for sexual pleasure. Human beings have multiple partners for solely sexual pleasure, NOT to spread their genes. There is a large difference there. I do not know any man that cheats on his wife so that he can go spread his genes and father children with many women. If there is a man who like the idea of having children with many women, GOOD LUCK.
And for all the men who complain that women appear too tired to have sex… how about you get your ass up and help her. Most women have careers nowadays, yet they are still expected to do house work. I am sure if you were willing to take turns with helping the baby and house, she would love to spend more time in the bedroom.
I have a question for cheaters on there.
Would you cheat if contraceptives of any sort did not exist?
WOW…I love my boyfriend to death but knowing this awful truth about men pushes me to become a lesbian. Either that or asexual. I can masturbate for the rest of my life.
By the way…why would a man EVER get married if he doesn’t want all of the bullshit that comes with marriage? It is websites like this that help me steer clear of marriage. I love penis, don’t get me wrong. I just think I should stay away from ever becoming emotionally attached to a PIG..ahem…I mean man, then I will never get hurt!!! Men that cheat will end up very lonely one day. Poor fools.
I am an extremely attractive young girl and my boyfriend and I have an amazing sex life that will never deaden. So….for all of you cheating (whatever your lame excuse may be) bastards, why don’t you marry someone that you are completely satisfied with sexually who knows how to keep things spiced up.
I feel bad for the women who marry pathetic fools who can’t keep their junk in their pants. Thank god my guy isn’t like that. I’m probably gonna go fuck his brains out now. CIAO!!
What a load of utter bullshit. The only correct one out of that entire list is number 9, but you got one thing wrong there, it is totally irrelevant whether or not the woman is insecure, confident or not. They cheat because they can because no matter where you are in the world, no matter how perfect or how imperfect your woman is there is always the opportunity for a man to cheat if he really wants to that badly and it 100% has no reflection on the woman whatsoever. It is his choice. His consequence. His mistake.
Men cheat because they think with their dicks, have massive egos and are selfish bastards irrespective of what’s at home waiting for him.
Just to reiterate your list from someone who has been the victim of being cheated on by the man she thought she was going to marry (several times it turns out)……..
1.Not getting enough at home! – bullshit. not an excuse. If that’s the case explain this, I have an extremely high sex drive and I am a sexually adventurous woman and he could have it any time he wanted and I would try it on with him too. So not even slightly relevant to why he cheated.
2.It’s reassuring to know that he’s still “got it”. – got it? Got what? A dick? Another woman needs to remind him that he has a dick that functions properly? Or, that he can still pull women? Do me a favour. I knew whilst with him I still got it, I still can pull, but they can look but not touch so why is it any different for a man?? I don’t need to screw someone behind my partner’s back to know whether or not I still “got it”. Talk about male insecurities. Meanwhile it’s a hindrence if the woman is insecure because that means we’re allowed to be shat on, but if a man’s insecure he needs to gain reassurance by getting laid. Yeah right.
3.The wife just isn’t physically appealing anymore. – Oh do me a favour. Unless he’s Brad Pitt I think he needs to reassess the situation darling and take a good look in the mirror himself. Also, in my experience, the woman he does cheat on you with is a pig so explain that one. And what about us girls who ARE physically appealing. Bollox, I’m not denying it. I’m slim, blond, blue eyes, beating them off with a stick. I kept my knickers on. If we’re going to start on physical appearances then why did a short chubby shit cheat on a babe? Doesn’t even make sense. And yes I held a job, cooked, sex, everything so don’t even go there. Point is, Mr Below Average got in there because I fell in love with his mind and soul,…. still not good enough for a bloke though is it??!? It doesn’t matter whether you’re Kate Moss or Mrs Blobby, if a man wants to cheat, a man wants to cheat. Hello??!! Are you demented,… Halle Berry, Sandra, Sienna, all these super foxes getting cheated on by lets face it not particularly special men, some random with dread locks, a tatooed hill billy and a balding narcissist? Mmmmm me thinks those men should’ve been grateful for what they already had. Urgh,… and Jude, the nanny? Says it all really
4.Sex at home is boring. The wife doesn’t like to try new things (or old things – namely, blow jobs!). – Again. Bullshit. My ex got more blow jobs than hot dinners. If anything he was the prude certainly not me. Proper mummy’s boy, there’s me thinking ahhhhh how sweet he treats his mother so nicely, that might mean he’ll treat me nicely too. Err. Nope. All lies. He wasn’t exactly a stalion, certainly no stud and incredibly selfish in bed and NO I did not nag about his selfish performance in the sack because I never wanted to hurt his ego. So all these stereotypical reasons as to why men cheat are just so far not applicable let alone a good enough excuse to cheat in the first place.
5.He just couldn’t say no. The woman was hot and all over him. – Hahhahaa!!!! Well that one just makes me laugh so much because the woman I do know 100% that he slept with (because the pathetic worm finally confessed) is an absolute rotter. The only thing I did know about her is that she was a total slapper but although I knew she was in his life, I never doubted him, always trusted him because I honestly thought there’s no way he would risk our relationship for that, she’s a fat dog with a face like a slapped ass and probably has herpes. I doubt very much that a beautiful woman unless he’s filthy rich, famous or she “thinks” he’s single, would end up in bed with your average joe. And again, do you not think women in relationships get hit on? Hell yeah we do. But out of respect for our partner we turn round and tell these plonkers to sod off so why can’t he? I’m strong enough to say no. Why should it be any different for a man?
6.The wife just isn’t fun anymore. She worries, she nags, she fusses and they fight all of the time. He cheats to “get away from it all”. – Well, let me tell you something about men which you clearly don’t know, men nag, bitch, moan and complain every second of the freakin day. It would drive me mad. But I’d sit there, listen to his whinging, advise him, hug him, tell him it’ll be okay, I certainly didn’t go out there and f”ck someone else because he had a bad day! So that’s yet another lame excuse…. Men bitch and moan just as much as women do. I work in a man’s world, I hear you sodding whingers bang on all day about your insignificant problems. Screaming Marys the lot of you
7.He just doesn’t love his wife anymore. And just how do you tell someone that tactfully? – Well they were born with a pair of balls so why don’t they use ‘em for a change, man up and tell the woman BEFORE he cops off with another bird, “I’m sorry, I don’t love you anymore, goodbye”. If he had any respect for her whatsoever he would end the relationship first before dipping his pickle and running. Not an excuse. And FYI men, you should ALWAYS respect a woman, no matter what you think or feel for her
8.The thrill of the chase is exhilarating. Some men are truly addicted not only to the act of sex itself, but to the hunt. They thrive on the rush they get when they are able to conquer even the toughest “ice queen”. It’s not about love, it’s about control and winning! – What a crock of shit. There are a million other ways of gaining control, conquering something that seems unobtainable (which obviously isn’t some “ice queen” slapper if he ends up nailing her and she puts out is it?). How about putting all that energy into your work, providing for your family, or even just playing a footy match on a sunday with your mates. Seriously. Grow up. It’s a shag, not world domination. You get the same results at home as you do in a seedy motel room. Conquering what exactly? A vagina? Oh please. What a load of tripe.
9.They cheat because they can. Many men know that their wives are insecure and dependant on them. They also know that low self esteem and a fear of being alone will keep her “in place” and “at home” no matter what, or who they do. So, why not? Variety – remember? – BULLSHIT! MEN CHEAT BECAUSE THEY ARE INSECURE! NOT US! They also cheat because they’re selfish, they have no respect, they see a pair of tits and can’t get it together, they have MASSIVE egos but no self esteem what so ever. So you can cheat because your woman is dependant on you?!!?? Who wrote this shit? That dependant woman is probably at home nursing his bloody brood, cleaning his house and cooking his supper. And what does he do? Go shag someone else. Yeah. Ok. That makes perfect sense,…. if you’re an ungrateful cold hearted bastard
10.And finally, men cheat to get even! – Absolutely. Fair enough. That’s about the only one that makes any real sense. But what about us women? If he cheated on me am I then allowed to justify sleeping with someone else because he did it first? If we do it, whether he cheated first or not, are we sluts or are we just trying to find the perfect sperm to impregnate us like biology tells us to do as women? And if us as women biologically seek to find the perfect donor then how the flying f@ck do ugly blokes manage to get laid? It’s all a load of shit. I’ll tell you all now why men cheat more then women, and why women cheat less then men…. Because women are more emotional, complex creatures with a physical body that needs a specific sort of sexual attention in order for us to orgasm. Men on the other hand get a few tugs and spill their beans sometimes even in seconds. Losers. Says it all really. And men just can’t be bothered to please anyone besides themselves. It’s sheer laziness (as well as selfish, conceited, foolish, retarded etc etc…. a million ways to describe how much a prick a bloke can be when think cheating is OK) And a one night stand, a hooker, some office slapper, doesn’t give a shit whether or not she’s getting off (and trust me ladies, if he isn’t getting you off, he won’t be getting her off, only difference is she’s perfecting the fake “O”, which you loser men can’t even tell the difference). At the beginning of the relationship it’s all great, touchy feely, considerate to our female sexual needs, falling in love etc,… then before you know it the bastard gets lazy, lets himself go, neglects you and starts giving you shit. How ironic as that basically is a mirror image of all the reasons this plonker reckons why it’s the woman’s fault he cheats. Well if that’s the case, then why aren’t we cheating too?
And just to wrap it up,… as for all the biological bull shit that everyone keeps using as their argument to excuse men’s disgusting behaviour (which by the way, breaks families, ruins childrens’ lives, hurts friends and families, effects people’s work, careers, basically the victim’s entire life for even sometimes a very long period of their life), we can simply enable men to continue to hurt and behave like this because science says so? What a crock of shit. What about the lying part? Is that biology as well? I don’t give a crap what science or biology says. We’re not damn dirty apes living in the f@cking jungle, we’re developed human beings, living in contstructed societies to create harmony, peace and ease of living. We can travel to the moon for f@ck sake but still a man can’t do the simplest of things and keep his dick in his pants. Yes there is no ideal world, no ideal place, but for f@ck sake, haven’t us women got enough shit to deal with on a day to day basis with work, bills, pregnancy, pmt, children, taking care of our men etc, let alone having to sit there at home alone 1am wondering where the hell that bastard is whilst his dinner sits in the fridge. Bullshit. That’s not biology. That’s selfishness. If these blokes want to live like biological animals then get back in the caves where you belong with the wolves and let us chicks get on with it, we’ll come to you when we fancy getting fertilized.
I can’t resist but I do have to direct further comments towards one particular person and that is you Adam.
Your mentality is a perfect example of how and why so many women, children and in fact even men end up in pain, misery and live in regret for the rest of their lives.
Your perception of sex is infantile, like a teenage boy and simply selfish. You seem to be someone who relies on prostitutes, easy sex, and no doubt porn. There is nothing remotely masculine about that. We live in the 21st Century meanwhile you still maintain the mentality of a cave man. I fear that if you maintain this perception of sex and love you will end up an old and lonely man, perhaps in Thailand?
You think you are so smart, intellectual and acquainted with the facts of life. But one thing which seems extremely apparent is that you reveal yourself to be exceptionally small minded and totally insensitive to human emotions.
Your agrument is totally one sided but at the same time absolutely proves my point which is that (some) men are selfish, greedy, and think only of one thing.
And please, do not discuss love as something you understand or know. You clearly have never experienced love or perhaps never even been truly loved by a woman because trust me, when you deeply and passionately love someone, the very thought of that person committing the most intimate act you have between just the two of you is an unbearable thought and excrutiating pain.
I don’t believe all men are diabolical. I’m very sure I will meet someone who will be faithful and loving to me just as much as I will be to him. And no ex fiance, and certainly no grotesque comments from a random on the internet with a permanent hard-on is going to alternate my thoughts on the prospect of me and any other woman for that matter meeting a good, honest and faithful man.
Nonetheless, each to their own I guess. I just can’t help but find your views incredibly sad and perverted. Perhaps you should seek therapy.
I would like to state a few of my opinions, about why men do cheat and if it is inbuilt into their genes to do so.
I believe this invented hypothesis (created by man no less!) is the best “get out of jail card” created. Men that cheat have unfortunately deluded themselves into a form of denial, that it is somehow not their fault! Whether it is due to a chance that was just too good or purely because women are like no more than a pick a mix of treats, that have to be sampled nothing more nothing less is tosh. This denial temporarily rids them of the guilt ie “if only she tried harder or tried new things, I wouldn’t have had to do it” the cheating fills the emotional void that is so often hidden to even the cheater themselves. The guilt then resurfaces in the face of needing their ego boosted, therefore the pattern of cheating, them lying about it, and guilt continue in a vicious circle. The more immature mindset will be convinced it is either their partner forcing them to cheat, or that it is somehow instilled in them either in a biological sense or just who they are.
We as humans are brought up to know the difference between right and wrong, some choosing whichever option they can to prevent harm, the other living their life to feed their id (in psychodynamic phrasing) their child within, caring not for consequence or others but for their own gratification.
I know people will argue with me that it is a primal thing (cheating) and we have no choice, or control over this, as you will gather from my opinions so far this is incorrect. If we are so heavily ruled by our primal insticts where does that leave us really? we cannot assume that if this is the case how could someone who cannot control themselves to refrain from cheating, not stop there? I am not accusing people who cheat of sexual offences, I am trying to highlight the gravity of what they are implying!
I find that these people are trying to state (some who have voiced their opinions so elequently on here) are nothing more than a primal being, answering only to their cravings and needs! Are these people expecting us to believe that they are so evolved and talk with such intelligence and integrity, appear quite academic and yet claiming to hold their hands up when it comes to controlling their libido! that they can control themselves to some degree and they can be a model citizen except that they cannot control temptation as a matter of a biological defect or ability (depending on whose blog you read!)
I will finish off by saying we have some urges of a primal nature fact, but we have choice, control, and emotional factors such guilt, compassion, and fear.
How we choose to act in a situation is individual, not biological. We are not victims of circumstance when it comes to cheating, if temptation is there we do not have to take it, easy no, but that is what separates the self aware to the insecure.
The self aware will be able to see past the initial temptation and think of the consequence before they act upon it, the insecure will act upon it then realise the consequence after the event, rid themselves of the guilt by placing the blame elsewhere.
That is just a few of my opinions I am not asking for everyone to except or even like them, but they are my opinions which cannot be swayed with either intellectual or crude comments.
@ Adam
Clearly, you think you’re just a witty little genius, huh? How droll.
At any which way, you clearly underestimate the fact that women and men have no differences when it comes to sex. You seem to almost demonize men, though it doesn’t seem like you mean to. Your assumption of all women thinking of sex as love and of all men thinking it isn’t is so grossly inaccurate, I find it kind of depressing. You’re a cynical little boy, aren’t you?
For one thing, not all men are like that, you’re a moron. Sure, there are some of those booty-hunting perverts that you seem to be, I won’t bother denying that accusation. But, you seem to think of yourself as a majority in the genre of ‘modern men’. You’re not. Men cheat because of the same reason why women cheat- they feel bad about themselves, they’re physically attracted to this other person and ‘lose’ control, or maybe they just like someone else.
Between you and the idiotic author who wrote the article, I find the whole thing rather funny. The fact that you or she can suggest that it’s the woman’s fault that a man cheats is simply laughable! I don’t think I’ve met two more ignorant people in my life. ‘Have a threesome, that’ll fix everything’. Are you insane? That’s the dumbest, most selfish idea in the world. If you’re so concerned about threesomes, maybe you should have one with another man so she doesn’t cheat on you, huh? Oh, you’re probably some kind of lonely, cynical bachelor who can’t hold down a girlfriend. Either that, or you’re in a miserable relationship where you’re so self conscious about yourself that you somehow feel the right to dig up the gall to blame women for all your relationship problems. Tell me, which is it? Oh, but of course, you would never be able to admit to either.
Another thing- You are so mistaken in thinking that it’s not in OUR genes to have sex, too. Humans, in general, are very sexual creatures. Both genders. Don’t talk to me about genetics- I doubt you know the slightest thing about biology. Women are just as much inclined to have sex as men. In fact, I know women with more of a sexual drive than even the horniest man. You may call them sluts, but either way, it disproves your little ‘theory’ that all women are just innocent little girls who think sex is just about love. I know more girls who cheat than boys.
The funniest part of you is that you think you’re so anti-pop-psychology. You think you’re so very unique. You’re the most backwards-thinking man I think the world has to offer. Men hundreds of years ago didn’t think they should stay faithful, they wanted more than one woman at once- they felt no inclination to hold themselves to one woman. You’re not some kind of new thinker, you have yet to evolve in your opinions. And, that’s fine, it’s your opinion. But don’t claim that your opinion is so different, so non-mainstream. Almost a hundred percent of men in the shitty parts of the world think the same as you. And, while they think that, they’re busy denying women the right to vote, the right to protect themselves, the right to say no.
Here’s the fact of the matter, dear Adam- You and other men cheat for the same reasons girls do. You’re upset with how you look, you’re selfish, you feel you can do anything you want, and you are just miserable with the fact that you will always be alone. Sure, you’ll be with women. But, really- no woman you will ever see will share a heart with you. They won’t know what you think, they won’t care about you, they’ll not give a shit what happens just as long as you keep bangin’. And, finally, when Lil’ Adam has problems, you’re life will be miserable. You won’t have love, and you’d have lost the one thing that matters to you. Sex. No girl you will find will ever be enough. Who’s heart does that really break? Hers? Or yours?
Your nativity is just sad. But, I understand how miserable you are on the inside. When you lay in bed at night, staring at the ceiling, thinking of just how alone you are- I get that. I do not feel it, but I get it. My love- he told me we will wait to have sex until we were married, because he wants it to mean something. He refuses to look at other women, he knows everything about me, he helps me when I’m in trouble and I help him. The mere thought of other women cannot cross his mind. His friends hate him because of how bad he makes them all feel. When they show him a picture of a naked girl and ask if she’s hot, he calls them perverts and chastises them for looking at nude pictures while they have a girlfriend, he yells at them for turning their head when a girl walks by. You may come up with some kind of smart remark about how he’s hiding everything or how he’s faking or how he’s gay- or anything else you can think of. But, the truth is, he is the specimen who disproves your little male theory.
Men like you are just like those lonely feminists who think all men are trash. Except, instead of thinking that women are trash, you think it of your own gender. Of yourself.
How tragic.
My boyfriend brought up threesome..OMG I know hes into porn..so em I..but to actually perform these sexuall acts for him with another woman..is definitely insane..iam kinda afraid he will cheat if I dnt..
i just found out my dad cheated on my mom..AGAIN, he did like once or twice when i was a young teen.. shit almost killed me..i was a mess for months..not to mention my mom waisted away in the bed for 6 months and puked everyday.. he wrks on the road all the time and has to stay away from home often,, anyways im almost 21 and just found out he did again on his last job..for some reason this hurts me (SO) bad..all i have been doing is sitting around and crying, but strange i take this worse than my mom does..idk if shes just use to the bs or what..anyways, what im sayin is..if you would do that to your family while your married you are a pos. divorse the other person first..it hurts way more to have to hear it frm other ppl..andit kills the children in the sittuation..for example im almost 21 just had my first child and im sitting her balling my eyes out!! personally things will never be the same between me and my dad and ive always been a daddys girl! ** you hurt more than the wife when you do bullshit like this just remeber that!! shit is fowl..just pure out FOWLLLL!!! :/
Men cheat because they are selfish and insecure. That is it.
There can be several excuses for both men and women to cheat, but they are still just excuses. Men can be sometimes extremely shallow and not willing to look beyond the surface of things. This is a fact. Take a look how men judge women solely on looks. They are hardwired this way. They also have a one-track mind. They think in the moment. I know a man who admittedly cheated on his girlfriend, but did not think of the consequences because it was in the moment. It was not planned and he felt pretty guilty afterwards, but he was still selfish. They aren’t able to envision the “big picture” with the same ease as women.
Oh and men aren’t the only ones to blame. Women are calculating when it comes to cheating. Men don’t think as strategically as women do. I know a very young women I work with who is playing a game to see if her married “boss” will cheat on his wife with her. It is just sickening. She asks people to “fluff” her up in front of him and got fake boobs to entice him. The point is this is the way shallow people work; both men and women. It is a game and a dangerous game when infidelity is involved. This so-called “list” is just amusing. No self-respecting man will break a marriage and family for a roll in the hay.
@Lucy, Bravo!!! I laughed like a mofo when I read what you posted.
women need to understand 1 thing tho: they really need a man to take care of them. All they need a man for is to get fertilized once in awhile when SHE feels like actually having a kid. lol! Other than that, let the bastard live in a fucking cave! It’s all they deserve and are good for anyway. And that BS about how women should appreciate their men. Horse Apples!!
Men should be GRATEFUL that they have any woman who would want their nasty, stinking, grubby, selfish asses anyway!!! PERIOD!!
Face it MOFOS, you need us MORE than we will EVER need you!!!
As interesting, valid and finger-pointing as everyone’s argument is sadly no one is above anyone. Men cheat, women cheat and ironically all for the same reasons. If you look up why women cheat they cheat for the same childish valid reasons. I say childish because in all honesty it is childish. So everyone can come up with all the reasons and excuses why they cheat….bottom line is everyone cheats…wait generally speaking. If I sound redundant it’s to prove a point on how everyone’s opinion really sounds the same.
The older I get, the funnier the whole “infidelity” thing is to me. I guess, if you are in a stable and loving relationship, you know that it is just really foolish to even entertain the idea of cheating (urges or not). If you want a “thrill”, it can be directed in other healthy ways. But what really gets me is when I see immature people (and I am sorry, but I feel that it is a lot of young early 20 year olds who have not had a lot of independence), thinking that cheating is a game. It ruins people’s lives. Yes, it takes two to tango, but society is “normalizing” cheating and it is dangerous and harmful for all of us.
I guess because I have witnessed the ugliness of this happen first-hand and I see that everyone makes excuses (because let’s face it, it’s easy if you just read some of these posts), but there isn’t a lot of accountability taking place. True story: A friend of mine’s family was ripped apart by a husband cheating. Some of the reasons stated above probably applied. Although, they may be reasons, they aren’t excuses. He cheated with his 24 year-old secretary. She was cute and could get just about any man but targeted a family man and her boss. In fact, apparently no one could say no to her. New car, new clothes, the whole she-bang. She schmoozed and flirted with him. She fluffed his ego and it worked. I don’t know how long it eventually went on, but he called it off trying to come clean, he broke his wife’s heart and lost trust from his children. He did eventually want to come back, but she wasn’t able to fully trust him again. It is really sad because they have 3 kids and are dealing with this as well since the mistress went “psycho” on their entire family.
Sadly, stories like this one are not unique and I see this stuff going on every day. I see it happening at my work right now with another 25 year-old coworker who doesn’t understand the depth of destruction she is causing. Instead, she thinks it is funny. But like I said before, her generation has been infiltrated with this stuff in the media, news and in everyday life. It is “normal” for this kind of behavior. She literally calls it a “game”. I apologize for the preachiness of this post, but it really concerns me. Why do we as a society condone such actions? Why is this okay? Why do we always tend to lay blame on the wrong things? This article really heats me up because I really believe it is giving excuses for cheating and infidelity in an already disloyal and unfaithful society.
If you look at the male species in all animal kingdoms, for the most part, their drive for populating their surrounding area with the genes of ones’ self; is only a fraction of the process of a mans’ orgasm. The real analogy of why a man cheats, or let me say, why men have so much desire to have an orgasm with so many mates, is because: a males’ appearance, confidence, challegings, domanancy, and acquiring many females within the span of his life time, to not only supply his donations to the populated gene poole, but to become over time, addicted to the the feelings of having powerful orgasms; never being satisfied…….demented by the androgen hormones testosterone and androsterone…..his male development; in all aspects.
Men, the majority of men; will commite and have commited crimes, sexual crimes, against women and their children, in the name of that All powerful orgasm that their mind so aggressively seeks on a daily to weekly basis. That drive that makes the male species want to feel a head throbbing orgasm in the name of innocence, un-tainted love, emotional stability from their of….abuse of fear in the small and weiry and last but not least, in the name of trust, is so hormonal that to try and correct the default in the male kindom; so that women will survive a mans’ abuse resulting from their androgen defaults. I have come to believe that men need to be castrated in many catagories resulting from their gene failures in mastering their male androgen homones so that the male species will be a more valuable human being in developing and raising his own accomplishments! Testicle removal would save the planet from a sure destruction from androgen homone ruled existance. Go Figure!
I agree with the list. I love my wife, but there are things you just can’t do with your wife IMO. But a girlfriend, who’s up for anything, is something that I needed. I’ll never leave my wife, and I will always take care of her emotionally/financially/physically/etc. , but I’ll definitely be having sex with other women.
Hi ladies and gents, just a little about me than a question. I’m a 40 year old male, married with children. I clearly know what my role is in my marriage I’m the sole provider and protector of my family, but lately I just want to step outside my life. Since being with my wife I have always done what was expected. Look we have been together a long time a lot of women would love her life, shit honestly a lot of men would love mine. I just want to step out of my marriage sometimes just to be different. Is this so wrong?
Some thing all you ladies need to remember,for a man to cheat there has to be another woman for him to mount.So may be you should be asking why a woman would what a man that is so sordid in mind that he can mount a bitch,but still love his wife…………………………….
A man who cheats needs a woman with the same sordid brain cell as his own,so good luck to then both just please give the wife/husband a choice of there own so be a human and just let people know where they stand.
I’m a woman and I cheat alllll the time, not because I’m insecure but because men fucked up the world so much, the only thing to do is fuck them back and watch them cry over their own sins
Love and respect…..women desire love and men desire respect. If they are not getting it at home then they will find it elsewhere!
There is no excuse for cheating, but the reasons can be found in this book!
“love and respect”. Written by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
Sooooo when you get A.I.D.S and your dick starts to rot, what then?
What people don’t tell you in that most of the time it isn’t the wives who clam up sexually…it’s the husbands. Im all about having sex with my husband. I think he is the sexiest man on the planet. I will try anything and do everything! I love being that way with him. I love hearing him moan and go crazy and the feel of my tongue. The key to all of it is giving the respect and honor that he deserves and the husband and the head of our home and alllowing him to be the man in a world that has imasculated men through the garbage of the feminist agenda. Marriage is about the oneness that is created the moment that you take your vows before God. Anything that violates that oneness is cheating. Our marriage is solid because of Christ and the love that we feel for each other. Cheating is just another way that the evil one slinks into our marriages. We need to regard each other as we do ourselves. Caring, loving, honoring, respecting and cherishing. I wake up every morning a half hour before my husband so I can make him breakfast, coffee, lunch, juice, 2 water bottles and 6 snacks or so in his lunch box. He gets at least one text from me a day that says that I love him and am praying for him. I never talk poorly about him to anyone. He comes home to a clean home with dinner ready to rock and roll. I look GOOD everyday and maintain the sexy for my man. Old fashioned…yup and what!
If men are motivated to cheat by genetics, if men are really into having sex with many women to ensure a healthy gene pool of offspring, then in that case, we would have every woman walking around pregnant.
If men are having sex with many women to multiply, they would encourage their partner not to use birth control.
If men don’t like being married, then why propose to your girlfriend in the first place?
Remember its the MAN kneeling on his knee in front of his girlfriend asking her to enter into marriage with him.
It all comes down to having a choice.
A man CHOOSES to cheat.
He CHOOSES to step out of the marriage.
Nobody has ever held a gun to anyone’s head and made a man cheat on his wife and whole family.
So please, all of you out there trying to ration by saying men are predisposed to cheat, consider that humans are predisposed to kill too. We all have the urge to do many disturbing things, yet i would like to think that the majority of us have higher thinking to control ourselves.
I deeply regret getting married because of the pressures of marriage.
I personally do not think marriage is natural and two people are not meant to be together forever. Its not realistic at all.
Have I ever had emotionless sex and then dumped the guy, yes I have.
I am a female in her mid 20′s who was known as a man eater. I’ve done them then dumped them.
So before you go on saying women can’t separate sex from emotion, how do you explain female porn stars and female prostitutes?
If you are a man, you have no business describing the female kind because you have no idea what we are up to and what we are capable of.
The society and religion has fed you the bullshit of believing “what women are really like”.
Get together with a few modern women, you will find that not many of us want marriage or kids.
We have a whole lot more to lose when we get married.
According to the latest research, the numbers show that more men want marriage and less women are getting married.
Its too much of a hassle and I know exactly what they’re talking about.
Newsflash: Women cheat, too, but usually for emotional reasons.
A wife should keep her appearance looking good, as should a husband. Gender isn’t the issue here; but marriage is not an excuse to let yourself go. However, human beings are more than just roaming animals; we have the capacity to reason. We all have a choice to make the decisions we make, and such choices come with responsibility. A person’s lack of accountability when it comes to making irresponsible decisions show low-intelligence.
Don’t get married and reproduce if you wish to live the playboy lifestyle. If you aren’t getting what you need at home, go to marriage ocunseling and communicate with your partner. If that doesn’t work, then end the relationship. Think about how STD’s would be tremendously limited if people were faithful to their partners. Furthermore, if you think your infidelities don’t hurt your children, think again.
Conclusion: Grow a brain.
Thank you Eileen, Disgusted, Tara, Lucy, especially Lucy lol, Tam, and many others for sharing your most reasonable, intelligent, and even wise points of views.
@Lucy you are so wise and I am glad that I read your response because I was getting so mad it was unreal. Thank you Lucy. You don’t even realize that your words changed my mind about a lot of things when it comes to men in relationships with women. Thank you.
I don’t know….
I work hard, I keep a roof over her head. Since we were married several years ago, she quit working against what were the goals of our relationship and only wants sex when she is ovulating. She won’t do many of the things she used to do sexually… Has basically turned into a prude.
Every time I was worried about being laid off, she never once sought work herself. When I was laid off she never once bothered to look for work.
So… You women wonder why we cheat? It is because of some core ingredients like above… that lead to the below.
- We start to resent you. It may simply be the the lack of sex, the lack of job, the dismissal of what were once mutual goals.
- We then lose respect for you…Because seemingly, you have for us. You seem to take us for granted.
Yet you are surprised when your husband cheats? I would wager that a small number of us do cheat out of being rampantly horny… But my best bet is simple the fact that we have come to resent you and no longer respect you.
That doesn’t hardly seem fair to you does it? But it happens. No matter how many times we talk about it, or how many times we go to counseling… We end up back in the rut. Why? The threat of divorce or some rash action causes her to “fix” things temporarily and she slips right back into that behavior.
So tell me, what should a man do when he resents and doesn’t respect his wife? He will or may cheat.
If he is me… He has already retained a divorce attorney months ago and is plotting how cheaply to get out of the marriage. He is dissolving all solvent cash and investments… That new car? He rally needed it eh? By time he files for separation from you he’ll have had his attorney on a leash for over a year so you can’t claim he was “Willfully destroying assets”… and the only thing you will be able to split with him are his 401k and the equity in the house…. News for you, he stopped contributing to the 401k a year ago…. So your take will be less. The house? He stops paying on it and unless you can handle the payments, the bank will foreclose wiping out your share of the equity.
That is what happens dear women. So please, don’t be surprised when it happens. Chances are your husband was unhappy for a long time and it took a long time and a big swallow for him to even consider cheating… or pulling the plug.
It takes two, or so the story goes, but the old saying “keep your man happy at home” carries a lot of truth to this day.
Me? I’m still married. I’m still calculating when my marriage may possibly end or whether she’ll wake up and realize what is a stake and get with the program.
If I do nothing, and accept her behavior, then I assume I’ll/we’ll never be able to retire due to her inability/lack of desire to work. I assume we’ll never meet the goals we had as a couple before marriage.
I’m not fine with that. Flame me all you want.
This article is kinda old psychology if you ask me. Men don’t ‘need’ to have multiple partners and women it is not your fault if your ‘man’ does stray. I mean men, do you really believe women aren’t visual or sexual? I don’t know one woman that doesn’t like some eye candy. Also women too are capable of having very high sex drives. Maybe women should start feeling the need to ‘spread their eggs’ as men supposedly need to feel like they are spreading their seed. If a man cheats in a committed relationship, he does it because he wants to. He is purely acting on selfish insecurities that have nothing to do with his spouse or girlfriend. Men feel guilt not because they have been brain washed by society but because we instinctively know right from wrong. No one says you HAVE to commit. If you choose to commit then lie to your partner that is why the guilt, because your conscious tells you the difference between right and wrong, it’s why most of us have a conscious. Old psychology makes excuses for this type of behavior. The truth is if you are a cheater, you lack something within yourself. Don’t blame your partner.
Men usually cheat because they don’t get or don’t like what they get at home. The best way to keep a guy, be a wife, a professional if you work and sexy in bed. They will never leave YA….
Adam
—When you judge people for their “syntactical mistakes”, you might want to spell it right- it’s syntactic.
Cheers
wow these comments are so many i guess it depends who you are Christian…non christian….to understand where people are coming from. I’ve been cheated on and i think men cheat coz they’re pussy’s………….yah you heard me…….PUSSY’S
have you ever caught a man with he’s pants down……pathetic…..I feel bad for the bitches who think married men love them cause they don’t. they are just pussy’s running from issues at home by shagging your sorry ass’s
have you seen a bitch get caught by the wifey how she hides and say’s…….. ask your men he’s the one hounding me……sorry he’s smelling open ass thats wats he’s after.
so what makes two cowards come together and cheat you may ask..if you don’t already know its coz they are both pussy’s
@Adam, some guys are like you indeed. I have been chatting for over 8 years with a one that permanently tried to have sex with me and constantly underlined that his long term partner is the one he truely loves and blablabla. Eventually he ended up obsessed cause finally there was some pussy he could not have. Also he had totally dominated his partner over the years to the extent that she eventually lost her entire ego. Read David Buss to get some data: only 50% of men are like that,
@Xavier, so much agree with you. My respect, and I know a lot of such people luckily.
@Disgusted, exactly, something David Buss did not explain, how on Earth all those idiots use condoms, if they do that out of a biological need of spreading healthy genes?!
My own experience: I think David Buss is right at some point in his 50% interpretation, but he misses factors as religion, social status, education, family background, orphan or not, IQ of parents etc. However I have not fully researched this topic yet my data tells me that the results would be intimidating to “professional playboys”. So far there is consistency indicating that subjects have been not raised in solid moral background, not been supervised during youth and relativism played big role. On the contrary they may excuse their behavior by relativism also as adults which occurs “there are no absolute life guidelines every behavior is equally good”.
In summary: listen to stories of your grandmas. Have they met a lot of such idiots? No, 100 years ago most of educated elite were gentlemen. They had no other choice, social restraint was too big. And if there was a guy who was a playboy among them, noone shaked his hand. But in the era of romantism all big actions of bravery and sacrifice were possible, in the era of Darwin and Bauman there is only one rule: sorry to rip your thoat, otherwise you would rip mine.
I love when men play the biology card, “it’s in our genes to procreate with multiple partners.” If that’s the case, then your wife should have been cheating too because women are biologically disposed to try to find the best person to mate with. When women ovulate we are more attracted to men who look as they would have good genes (tall, muscular, good teeth, regular and strong features). When we aren’t ovulating we look for a man who looks like a good partner and will help us raise children (softer features). It’s the second man a woman would marry, so if biology is our driving force, your children should not be your own. Thank you social psychology.
I AM 66 YO WITH STENTS. I CHEATED SEVERAL TIMES JUSTIFYING WITH SOME REASON EVERYTIME SEXUAL ENERGY, DESIRE, URGE VARIES IN MEN, MORE THAN IN WOMEN IN GENERAL BECAUSE OF EXCESS ANDROGENS DRIVING, BUT IN CIVILISED WORLD, MEN SHOULD BEHAVE DIFFERENTLY FROM ANIMALS THOUGH TO SOME EXTENT SOME INSTITNCTS WERE DERIVED FROM ANIMALS LIKE APES. I AM AN ENDOCRINOLOGIST AND STUDIED COMPARATIVE ENDOCRINOLOGY. WE HAVE 7 STAGES IN OUR LIFE ACCORDING TO ELLIOTT. WE HAVE TO BEHAVE ACCORDINGLY. BUT LOOK AROUND- YOU FIND MAN’S DESIRE TO HAVE WEALTH, SEX TILL THE END, LIVE LIKE A TEENAGER. I CAME TO CONCLUSION THAT WE HAVE TO ACT CIVILISED.. IT IS NOT EASY. WE HAVE TO BE UNDERSTANDING AND GENTLE TO THE FEMALE PARTNER. THERE IS BEAUTY AND ENJOYMENT IN MONOGAMOUS RELATION IF WE CAN FOLLOW THE PRINCIPLE. THEN WE LEARN TO RESPECT THE OTHER PERSON WITH RESPECT. IN CERTAIN PROFESSIONS LIKE SAY A DOCTOR’S WE WERE TRAINED TO SEE A FEMALE PATIENT NOT AS A SEX OBJECT BUT AS YOUR DAUGHTER, MOTHER, SISTER ETC. LOOKS LIKE I ALREADY WENT TOO FAR AND BORED SOME. PARDON ME. READ MOST AMUSING COMMENTS, PROMPTING ME TO RESPOND. JALLE.
Sorry – I do not I agree with this list of 10 reasons why men cheat……They are clearly excuses to clear a man’s conscience perhaps……
Yes – I can relate to all of them – but the REAL REASON I see is that men are either POOR COMMUNICATORS OR THEY LIE TO THEIR WIVES (pretending they are happy when they are NOT).
And what about “real love” and caring about your wife’s feelings – especially if she finds out (and she will) that you have cheated. Maybe she doesn’t like everything you like – probably gets back to BE HONEST in the beginning…………… We ALL HAVE TO MAKE SACRIFICES …… women included.
Sorry men – show some guts and BEHAVE LIKE REAL MEN……..
My wife cut me off a year ago after she didnt come home all night. Her excuse was “she was too drunk to drive and fell asleep in her car”…. I guess I have “STUPID” on my forehead somewhere?
I have stuck around trying to work it out as we have a daughter who I love with all my heart…
But the lack of sex, the bills, her parents living with us and all the other crap in a marriage has pushed me over the edge…. I had an affair some time ago with someone I have known sincg High School.. (old GF).. it was awesome but with the guilt I havent done anything since….
I am still waiting but my wife wants nothing to do with me.. shit she never calls, we dont kiss… nothing…
If this doesnt work.. I will become a full blown “man whore” …. Iam really in need of some intimacy and I am not sure what to do.. cheat, divorce, ….. I am lost…
Maybe if women didn’t bitch and moan and sexually deprive men by showing more interest in the relationship with a variety of sex, the man wouldn’t need to cheat. I view women letting go of themselves is just unhealthy. I want my girlfriend to get in shape not just to look hot, but to be healthy because fat is one heartbeat away from a untimely death. At least that’s my opinion, be in shape to look good and be healthy, don’t do it for a guy do it for yourself. Guys hate women who let themselves go, they think if she doesn’t care to be healthy she wouldn’t care about the relationship.
I agree 100%. This issue has been around almost since the beginning of man kind and nothing has changed. Ppl jst dont want to except its our nature.we seem to detach ourselves frm nature and thats the problem bottom line